someone told me not to lost myself in the city today . suddenly in a very long time , i havent felt this alone . all caught up with d energy … suddenly all d ppl around me seems to fade away or some how temporary not visible . it seems like iv hurt myself n also d ppl around me dat i care so much abt . i am human after all . i am selfish . i am afraid to be alone . that i admit . im lookin for d once felt true love , but lookin back rite now . it seems i started on d wrong foot . and i kept goin d wrong direction all this while n i didnt once stop n consider abt it . how can i expect to find sum1 that will care for me , or that feeling i once had by doing d things i did this past week . i kinda fcuk it all up for myself . im being somebody that im wasnt all along, lookin in d mirror . i dun even know who i am now . its like a stranger staring back at me . i tot how nice it would b , being that stranger , but then again . his d loneliess person in this world . goin off track . way n way off d track till theres not even a dim light to get back where once i was at . im losing d marvin that i once knew bit by bit . it seems to myself n all d ppl around me , with my arrogance n ego that im cool with it all n im able to handle d loneliness all along , but one part of me knows that im breakin down n i sometime just need a hug n some sincerity . belonging to sum1 , getting nag or scold by sum1 , wheres my other side? wheres d person dat will make me feel complete . i dunno why im so weak , why cant i just feel like wat i said , being alone aint that bad , aint it . why am i afraid i cant find that special ever again in my life . am i givin up to loneliness so easily? … im turnin into somebody that i used to hate all along .
im really sorry to those who were concern . i deserve all this anyway . for d things i did . im sorry to who has come within contact with me and knowing my existence . for i am damned with bringing misery, pain & sadness for those who come within contact with me
lust // envy // greed // pride // gluttony // wrath // sloth